You, Too, Can Love Death Metal

I just saw this article, and I've got to say, it's one of the most humorous pieces I've read in a while. But don't get me wrong--I've got a soft (albeit pretty small) spot for death metal. It's just...well, you'll have to read it yourself, because it's almost too good to be true. I hope some skeptics will read it and come to a greater understanding of the hard work, dedication, and skill that goes into playing this music, which is often considered nothing more than noise and shrieks of pain and death.

http://www.wikihow.com/Appreciate-Death-Metal

However, I can't send you to this article without the following warning:

Death metal is a force. It will place your face in the oven on a cookie sheet at approximately 666 degrees, slightly lower at a higher altitude. Death metal will then remove said face, fully melted, roll into small "blankets," and let cool for 10-15 minutes. Your melted face will then be used to serve 12 with a mere 9 calories and 0 trans fats per serving.